What If My Spouse and I Still Live in the Same House—Can We File for Uncontested Divorce in Asheville?

What If My Spouse and I Still Live in the Same House—Can We File for Uncontested Divorce in Asheville?

For many couples considering divorce in Asheville, the legal requirement of living “separate and apart” for a full year before filing can lead to confusion—especially if financial or family circumstances have kept them under the same roof. If you and your spouse are still living in the same home, you may be wondering: can we still move forward with an uncontested divorce?

North Carolina’s divorce laws are specific and firm on the subject of separation. Unlike some states that permit legal separation while cohabiting in the same household under certain conditions, North Carolina law requires physical separation into two separate residences to start the clock on the one-year separation period. Living in the same house—even in separate bedrooms or on different floors—does not satisfy the legal requirement.

This blog explores the physical separation rule in North Carolina and what it means for couples in Asheville seeking an uncontested divorce. We’ll break down the statutory requirements, explore possible exceptions and misunderstandings, and offer practical guidance on how to establish separation that meets the legal standard. Whether you’re ready to file or planning ahead, an experienced Asheville divorce lawyer can help ensure you avoid mistakes that could delay or derail your case.


Understanding the One-Year Separation Requirement in North Carolina

North Carolina allows couples to file for absolute divorce after they have been “living separate and apart for one year.” This requirement is outlined in N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50-6 and applies to all divorce filings, including uncontested divorces.

Let’s break down what this really means:

  • “Separate and apart” means physically living in different residences—not just different parts of the same home.
  • The separation must be continuous and uninterrupted for 12 full months. Any attempt to resume marital relations may restart the clock.
  • At least one spouse must intend for the separation to be permanent—a mutual agreement is not required, but at least one spouse must have the intent to end the marriage.

Living in the same house—even with minimal contact—does not meet this standard. Courts in North Carolina have consistently held that physical separation into different households is required.


Why Physical Separation Is Mandatory

The rationale behind North Carolina’s separation requirement is to create a clear and objective standard for determining when a marriage has ended. The law distinguishes between emotional separation (no longer acting as spouses) and legal separation (physically living apart).

Living apart provides:

  • Clarity for the court in determining eligibility for divorce
  • A cooling-off period that allows couples to reconcile or move forward with certainty
  • Legal simplicity in determining the date of separation, which affects property division, alimony, and court filings

There is no such thing as a “legal separation” in North Carolina unless a court order for support or custody is issued. Separation starts the day one spouse moves out with the intent for the separation to be permanent.


Common Misconceptions About Separation

Some couples believe they can “separate” while continuing to live in the same home—especially for financial, parenting, or logistical reasons. Unfortunately, this is not the case under North Carolina law.

Here are some common misunderstandings:

“We’ve slept in separate bedrooms for a year—does that count?”

No. Physical separation requires living in two separate residences.

“We don’t eat together or speak to each other—aren’t we separated?”

No. Emotional separation is not the same as physical separation under the statute.

“I’ve been staying in the basement—does that qualify?”

No. The court requires clear evidence that the spouses resided in distinct households.

“If we sign a separation agreement, isn’t that enough?”

No. A separation agreement is helpful, but it does not substitute for the physical separation requirement.

To meet the legal test, one spouse must move out and establish a separate residence with the intent for the separation to be permanent.


What Happens If You File for Divorce Too Soon?

Filing for divorce before completing the full 12-month separation period will result in your case being dismissed. This can cause:

  • Delays in obtaining a final divorce decree
  • Additional filing fees
  • Lost time and legal expenses
  • Complications with property division and alimony timing

Even in an uncontested case where both parties agree to the divorce, the judge will not sign the final judgment unless the statutory requirement is met. North Carolina law does not permit judges to waive the one-year requirement.

An Asheville divorce lawyer can help you confirm your eligibility before filing and ensure your case proceeds without delay.


How Courts Determine the Date of Separation

The official date of separation is a critical fact in every North Carolina divorce case. It affects not only the eligibility to file but also how property and spousal support are handled.

Courts consider:

  • When one spouse physically moved out of the shared home
  • The intent to separate permanently (which must exist at the time of moving out)
  • The conduct of the parties during and after the move (e.g., resuming romantic relations may restart the clock)

The spouse filing for divorce will typically include the separation date in the complaint and confirm it in a sworn affidavit. If the other spouse disputes the date, the court may require evidence to determine the true date of separation.


Evidence of Physical Separation

If the separation date is ever challenged—such as in a contested divorce or alimony dispute—the court may ask for evidence that the spouses lived in separate residences.

Examples of acceptable evidence include:

  • Lease agreements or mortgage documents for the new residence
  • Utility bills or mail showing different addresses
  • Driver’s license updates or voter registration
  • Testimony from friends or family confirming the move
  • Text messages or emails that show the intent to end the marriage

In uncontested divorces, such disputes are rare. But it’s still wise to retain documentation of the move-out date in case questions arise.


Financial Reasons for Remaining in the Same House

Many couples in Asheville continue living in the same house for economic reasons. With housing prices rising and cost of living increasing, maintaining two households during separation can be challenging. However, the legal requirement for separation cannot be waived—even if remaining in the same house makes more financial sense.

Solutions to consider:

  • Temporarily moving in with family or friends until permanent housing is arranged
  • Renting a modest studio or short-term lease
  • Utilizing separate in-law suites or ADUs if on legally distinct properties
  • Exploring roommate options to reduce costs

It’s understandable that moving out is a financial burden, but it is a necessary step if you want to begin the separation clock under North Carolina law.

An Asheville divorce lawyer can help explore creative solutions that meet the physical separation requirement while minimizing financial disruption.


How to Begin the Separation Period Properly

To legally start your one-year separation in North Carolina, you should:

  1. Physically move into a different residence from your spouse
  2. Notify your spouse that you consider the marriage over
  3. Avoid actions that suggest reconciliation, such as romantic contact or shared vacations
  4. Maintain separate finances, if possible, to reinforce the independence
  5. Document the move (rental agreements, utility bills, forwarding mail)

Having clear evidence that the separation began on a specific date can help avoid disputes and ensure a smooth filing process after 12 months.


Can We File for Uncontested Divorce After One Spouse Moves Out?

Yes. Once you and your spouse have lived in separate homes for 12 consecutive months, you may proceed with filing for uncontested divorce—even if you still share parenting responsibilities or communicate regularly.

An uncontested divorce in Asheville allows you to:

  • Finalize the divorce without trial or hearing (in many cases)
  • File for summary judgment if both parties agree on terms
  • Submit a separation agreement outlining child custody, property division, and support
  • Resume a prior name if desired

The key is that physical separation must be complete and uninterrupted for a full year before filing.


What If We Reconcile Briefly During the Separation Period?

If spouses resume marital relations during the separation period, the legal separation may be interrupted—resetting the one-year clock.

Courts evaluate reconciliation based on:

  • Overnight stays for non-parenting reasons
  • Sexual relations (alone may not constitute reconciliation but are a factor)
  • Holding themselves out as married in public
  • Attending marriage counseling with the intent to reconcile

A single isolated encounter may not reset the separation clock, but prolonged resumption of cohabitation will. If reconciliation occurs, a new separation date must begin when one spouse again moves out with the intent to separate permanently.

An Asheville divorce lawyer can help you assess whether your separation period remains intact after limited contact.


What Happens If We Want to Stay in the Same House Until the Divorce Is Final?

You cannot legally file for divorce until you’ve met the separation requirement. If you and your spouse agree on all terms but are still living together, you must first:

  • Decide who will move out and when
  • Sign a separation agreement in the meantime to handle property, bills, and custody
  • Start the one-year clock once physical separation begins

Even if you plan to continue co-parenting or living amicably, the law still requires different addresses. The court will not recognize “in-house separation” as a valid basis for filing.


Creating a Separation Agreement While Still Living Together

Although you cannot file for divorce while living in the same house, you can still prepare a separation agreement in advance. This document can:

  • Outline how bills and debts will be paid during separation
  • Allocate parenting responsibilities
  • Address temporary spousal or child support
  • Divide property and vehicles
  • Set expectations for the separation period

The agreement becomes effective immediately and can be incorporated into the final divorce judgment once the 12-month separation is complete.

An Asheville divorce lawyer can help draft a separation agreement that protects both parties while planning ahead for divorce.


Why an Asheville Divorce Lawyer Is Essential

Understanding and applying North Carolina’s separation requirement is more complex than it seems. Filing too early, miscalculating the separation date, or assuming in-house separation counts can delay or derail your divorce.

An Asheville divorce lawyer can:

  • Review your current living situation and confirm when separation began
  • Help one spouse relocate in a way that meets legal standards
  • Draft a separation agreement while you prepare to file
  • Represent you in a smooth uncontested divorce after 12 months
  • Ensure all documents are properly filed with the Buncombe County Clerk

Even in the most amicable cases, legal support helps avoid mistakes and protects your rights.


FAQ

Can we be legally separated while living in the same home in North Carolina?
No. North Carolina requires that spouses live in separate residences to begin the legal separation period.

If we haven’t lived apart for a full year, can we still file for divorce in Asheville?
No. The court will dismiss the case if you file before completing the required 12-month separation.

Does sleeping in different bedrooms count as separation?
No. Physical separation means living in entirely separate residences.

Can we start our divorce paperwork before the separation year is up?
You can prepare your documents and negotiate a separation agreement, but you cannot file for divorce until the year has passed.

What if we briefly reconciled during the separation year?
The court may find that the separation period was interrupted, and the one-year clock may need to start over.

What if only one spouse wants the divorce?
Only one spouse needs to intend for the separation to be permanent. The other spouse’s agreement is not required to start the clock.

How do we prove that we’ve lived apart for a year?
You may provide leases, utility bills, mail forwarding records, and affidavits to show that physical separation occurred.

Can we file an uncontested divorce once we’ve lived apart for a year?
Yes. If you agree on all issues, you can file for uncontested divorce once the 12-month requirement is met.

Does the court ever make exceptions for the separation requirement?
No. North Carolina law does not allow judges to waive the physical separation requirement.

Should we still create a separation agreement while living together?
Yes. You can draft and sign a separation agreement at any time, even while sharing a home. It becomes effective once one spouse moves out.

The McKinney Law Group: Legal Guidance for Asheville’s Uncontested Divorce Cases
Even if everything is agreed upon, your divorce still needs to meet legal standards. We ensure Asheville clients meet all requirements and avoid costly mistakes during uncontested divorce proceedings.
Call 828-929-0642 or email [email protected] for experienced legal support.